The struggles of being a child raised in Mormon culture.

Typical Utah Mormon family.

When you look at this picture your instant reaction is,"Oh what a cute big family! They all look so happy." If you weren't born and raised in Utah you have no clue what the horrible truth is. Mormons are good at acting the part of happiness. They know how to dress well, look pretty and handsome, smile their white toothed smiles, and make it seem like their holy little lives are as happy as can be. It's a lie! Believe me underneath those bright smiles and fancy hairdo's lies people who feel very pressured to be something that deep down they know they're not!


I know because I lived it. I was raised in Utah, I was raised in Mormon culture, and I can look you straight in the eye and tell you that the misery and agony people go through in this religion runs so deep it's disturbing.

• You are taught from a very young age that you had better go to church every Sunday and look nice and act nice or you won't be accepted.
• You are taught from a very young age that those who are "none-members" are lost souls and that it's up to you to teach them to walk in the light of gods plan.
• You are taught from a very young age if you are a boy that you will go on a mission when you turn 19 and go to teach complete strangers who you've never met to join the church as if you have any sort of clue what you're talking about at the age of 19!
• You are taught from a very young age if you are a girl that if you want to be safe and secure in life that you better look really pretty all the time and marry a returned missionary at age 18 and have lots of kids and be subservient to your husbands every needs.
• IF YOU FAIL TO MEET ALL OF THESE REQUIREMENTS LIFE IS GOING TO BE VERY DIFFICULT FOR YOU TO FIT IN AND HAVE ANY SORT OF SOCIAL LIFE! IT'S A FACT!

Me at age five

My mother was a devout Mormon while I was a kid. My father was not. I don't know why my Mom was so strongly devout at the time because now she no longer practices Mormonism and she is much more of an open minded individual now than she was back then. My dad was not part of any religion, he showed up to church at times to show support for his kids when any of us were giving some sort of talk in sacrament meeting. But I'm lucky to have had a father who wasn't a typical Utah male! I know I would be completely different if I was raised by someone who pressured me into being something scripted for me at birth. I'd probably be a conservative returned missionary who loves to hunt and play football.

Mormon culture is an awful way of life. It is especially hard for those of us who ever dared think outside of the narrow Mormon box. I remember so many times in my life where I was bullied by kids who were the Bishops son, or the high priests son. In fact I would say nine out of ten bullies I had in my life growing up were strongly devoutly Mormon! Why? I think it's because they are taught that they are above others. They believe that god is on their side so they can't do any wrong.

my daughter at age five

I now have a daughter who is the same age as I was when I started feeling the pressures of living up to what the church expected of me.I won't make the same mistake my mother made. I won't force her to go to some building every Sunday and be spoon fed propaganda from a corporation that calls itself a church! A church that has the gall to tell her how to be, what to feel, what and how to think, how to look, and what to say. And if she doesn't do what they tell her to do she's somehow lesser than all of her other brainwashed peers. FUCK THAT! It absolutely breaks my heart to know that no matter how hard I try she will face the same prejudices, same intolerance, same social  un-acceptance as I did! Simply because she won't be raised a Mormon. It sickens me and maddens me to know that as I type this, the majority of her peers are being taught that they are better than her, that she is lost and needs to be shown the way. I hope that her generation is a little more progressive, a little more tolerant, a little more inclusive than mine is. Because just like her mother and father before her, if you bother to get to know her you'll see that she is a smart, funny, loving, caring, heart-felt, awesome person!

She just started kindergarten and me and my wife made the wise decision of having her do K-12 home-school rather than Utah public school. First off, Utah spends the least amount of money on dollar to child ratio than every other state in America. Second, she won't face the bullshit of feeling like school is a popularity contest rather than an institution to learn and grow. Third, nobody knows their kids better than their parents. My wife knows how to teach her in a way that a stressed out under-payed teacher in an overstuffed classroom ever could. Fourth, she won't learn the LDS ways of being a girl. Girls especially have it rough in Utah! They are taught to be overly pretty and kind of slutty. They are taught to have their first and foremost goal be to attract the boys, and it's a big damn competition over who looks and acts most like a hooker and my little girl will take no part in that!

And we're being proven right by the way, we just got her first report card last night and she has straight A's!
Lets celebrate....